Ever felt so angry or upset that you thought your head was about to explode? It’s hard to think straight isn’t it? But which is the best option – to let your feelings out, get them out of the way, or to stuff them back down inside to simmer and fester. How much energy do each of these options take?
At work, especially, we are trained to find emotions somehow weak or distasteful or unprofessional (even though we all have them). We think it is indulgent to let people express their feelings, worry that we have lost control if we or they do, or that it takes too long to allow for this.
We have mixed up the release of pain with the cause of pain. But when we repress out feelings we muddle our minds and we are unable to think clearly. If we could just let someone be sad, angry or afraid for a short while and pay attention to them while they did this, these feelings would soon pass and clear thinking return. Could you do this if someone was angry at you? Of course, if they are so angry they look as if they might turn violent it is wise to beat a hasty retreat.
If you knew that if feelings are expressed just enough, then thinking restarts, how differently would you react next time one of your team is upset?
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